Strings and Deadbolts

Don't you just love conversations that remind you why you are where you are?
I asked for reminders, and God surely gave it tonight.

We. Don't. Work. Period. I doubt we ever would.
It's hard enough to carry on a normal conversation without misinterpreting each other and ending in an angry argument.

There really is no point in continuing the endless argument that was a futile attempt at friendship.
Even normal conversations end in my emotional "craziness" and your masked fury.
There is no point, there is no reasoning, there is no longer a rhyme for the tune that we used to sing so beautifully.

I am sad that our feeble attempts at friendship ended in shatters. I am sorry for hurting you, if I did, by my words. However, I am not sorry for standing up to you and speaking my mind. Telling you that you insulted me is not "crazy"; it is human. It is a very small attempt to construct a conversation with civility. Obviously, that did not work, and again, I'm not sure that it ever will.

But for tonight, at least, I can say this: I have closure. And when I say closure, I mean deadbolt.

I am who I am. If anyone plans on changing that, it's God. You have no power over that. So don't tell me I'm wrong, don't tell me how you think I am acting or reacting. Because the reality is that you don't know me, and you never really did - you never cared to learn.

And for that, I am partially grateful. I wasted two months on you, and I'm not about to waste any more. While grateful for the lessons I learned, I am also grateful that I no longer have to argue with you, or worry about misinterpreting you, or worry that I'm giving you too much affection.

The past happened for a reason.
The past is in the past for a reason.

Thank you, God, for this sure reminder.